executor: check memory limit before allocate large memory in HashAgg

[wshwsh12]

What problem does this PR solve?

Issue Number: ref #35635
close #40647

Problem Summary:
Now AggExec will expand the map first and then track the memory usage. May cause a lot of memory to be allocated at once before the SQL OOM action is taken.
We can move the tracking before the expand to avoid it.

What is changed and how it works?

Check List

Tests

• Unit test
• Integration test
• Manual test (add detailed scripts or steps below)
• No code

Side effects

• Performance regression: Consumes more CPU
• Performance regression: Consumes more Memory
• Breaking backward compatibility

Documentation

• Affects user behaviors
• Contains syntax changes
• Contains variable changes
• Contains experimental features
• Changes MySQL compatibility

Release note

Please refer to Release Notes Language Style Guide to write a quality release note.

None

[ti-chi-bot]

[REVIEW NOTIFICATION]

This pull request has been approved by:

• XuHuaiyu
• hawkingrei

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[XuHuaiyu]

/merge

[ti-chi-bot]

This pull request has been accepted and is ready to merge.

Commit hash: f05356f57b2780d12bf14b1c3ea56a78819cdef2

[wshwsh12]

/merge

[ti-chi-bot]

This pull request has been accepted and is ready to merge.

Commit hash: 873228d

[sre-bot]

Code Coverage Details: https://codecov.io/github/pingcap/tidb/commit/25e9126a37a2ea28c840cbdd9cceb6ed40758987

[sre-bot]

TiDB MergeCI notify

🔴 Bad News! New failing [2] after this pr merged.
These new failed integration tests seem to be caused by the current PR, please try to fix these new failed integration tests, thanks!

CI Name	Result	Duration	Compare with Parent commit
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/mybatis-test	🟥 failed 1, success 0, total 1	3 min 6 sec	New failing
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/integration-compatibility-test	🟥 failed 1, success 0, total 1	1 min 46 sec	New failing
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/common-test	🔴 failed 5, success 6, total 11	5 min 25 sec	Existing failure
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/integration-common-test	🔴 failed 6, success 11, total 17	12 min	Existing failure
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/integration-ddl-test	🔴 failed 3, success 3, total 6	7 min 33 sec	Existing failure
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/sqllogic-test-2	🔴 failed 7, success 21, total 28	6 min 15 sec	Existing failure
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/sqllogic-test-1	🔴 failed 9, success 17, total 26	5 min 53 sec	Existing failure
idc-jenkins-ci/integration-cdc-test	🟢 all 36 tests passed	45 min	Existing passed
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/tics-test	🟢 all 1 tests passed	10 min	Existing passed
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/plugin-test	🟢 build success, plugin test success	4min	Existing passed