[data grid] Reshape row selection state model

[cherniavskii]

See #13757 (comment)

TODO:

• Use Set instead of array
• Change the model signature to support either inclusion or exclusion model

  { included: new Set() }
  // or
  { excluded: new Set() }

Problems:

• We still need to go through each row to call the isRowSelectable prop. There is no way to overcome this if user provides the isRowSelectable prop. But if the prop is not provided, we can skip the whole looping over rows since all of them are selectable.

[cherniavskii]

@romgrk Does this proposal make sense to you?

[romgrk]

LGTM

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